A couple people have said congrats to me in passer-by conversation for being pregnant again. That's a surprise to even me! :) We are most certainly not pregnant again. But these rumors have sparked conversation between Travis and I about when and if we want another baby.
Right now, we are very focused on our Dave Ramsey debt free lifestyle that it would not be financially beneficial to bring another child into our family. In a few years when we're debt free, it won't be a financial burden to support another family member. Having two in diapers wouldn't be a problem if we were debt free. We are working diligently to meet our financial goals and then can consider having another baby. I have been told that if you wait until you have enough money to have kids then you will never have them. Although I appreciate this statement, it shows maturity in having diligence in becoming debt free and patience enough to wait until we can stand on our own two feet.
Lucas is our pride and joy. We never thought we could love something or someone so much. We enjoy being able to give him our undivided attention and spend his early childhood focusing just on him in order for him to learn all the lessons he needs to learn. With another child in the house, we would not have the opportunity to focus as much undivided attention when he needs it the most. Time is precious in our household, as both Travis and I work outside the home and often come home exhausted as it is. I would feel like I am not giving Lucas all of me by having another baby.
Along with that time issue, sleep deprivation is a fear. I am constantly tired as it is. As I think back to Lucas' first few months, I know that I am certainly not ready for the lack of sleep that a baby brings. Lucas just now, at 8 months, is sleeping through the night. I don't think I could handle another round of sleep deprivation.
Throughout my early pregnancy, I slept fairly well and kind of enjoyed carrying a child. The 'new' excitement kept me motivated and brought me through those first few months. In the later part of my pregnancy, though, I was absolutely miserable. And everyone around me knew about how miserable and uncomfortable I was. You see, I'm a short woman and it was a very hot summer. Lucas spent his last two months inside of me practicing kicking footballs. I will be the first to say that I was not a nice pregnant lady and I was not the easiest person to be around. I'm not sure that I want to subject my family or myself to this again. Adoption sounds like a great plan! :)
Finally, there's what Lucas' Aunt Tana calls 'second child syndrome.' Montana is Travis' little sister and is the second child. She says that for the first child, you devote so much energy and time toward getting ready for them, completing the baby book, taking pictures, journaling your pregnancy, and when they arrive it's so special and miraculous. Then for the second child it's like "been there done that" and you tend to not do the same special things. Although I think this is a bit silly, at the same time, I can see how this could happen. I have documented everything of Lucas' from his first word to first bath to first time he sat in snow. Would I would have the same time and energy to devote to a second child right now? I don't think so. I'm so excited to teach Lucas everything and show him the world that I feel like having another baby would not benefit him or the baby.
By waiting for a few years, Lucas will be old enough to understand what's happening rather than feeling like he's being replaced. We will be able to teach him how to be gentle and take care of the baby. He will independent enough to help with getting ready in the morning, feeding time, and will know how to follow a routine.
And so, obviously, we will try to wait to have a second child. And this new baby may not even be ours biologically, but through adoption. We will see what God has planned for our family! :)
Thanks for stopping by! Have a blessed week!
